Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Ooooohhh... a doggy!

Here's a super cute picture of our fairly new dog: Buddy. That's actually short for 'Notoriously Handsome Buddy'. Seriously. If you don't believe me, I'll show you his papers. Anyway. He's this massive, plodding chocolate lab, that mopes around giving us sad looks like, "why don't you people feed me more?"

God forbid he should ever step on your toe.

So, I wrote a limerick about him. It didn't win, but I thought I'd share.

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My Lunk-head Dog

If ever you visit my home
You should know how my dog says ‘hello’
He’ll fly straight and true
Like an arrow towards you
Delivrin’ your groin a great blow

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Al-righty then. The real reason I'm posting.

I've had my beta copies of Fiersom's Brood circulating for almost two weeks now and I'm starting to get some good feedback. It's helped a lot when it comes to grammatical goofs and continuity coughs, but what I really need is some intense, knowledgeable crit of the first few pages. Thus, this morning, I posted the first chapter to Absolute Write. For those new writerly friends of mine who are active on AW, perhaps you could find it in your heart to give it a lil' 'once-over'. I want, I desire, I need to have these first pages perfect. If not, then everything I've ever written has been for naught; all is lost, and I shall not write again.


FIERSOM'S BROOD


One last thing: I'm adding this new block of links to my sidebar, "Care to read some of my writing?"

I'm not a huge fan of short fiction. I don't particularly want to write short fiction. But I have in the past. If you're interested in reading some of my old short stories or novellas, by all means, click the links, but it really won't hurt my feelings if you don't.

The writing, for the most part, kind of blows. (I've gotten better, I think).


13 comments:

Jewel Allen said...

I have two dogs. My beagle sounds like yours, with the sad puppy eyes begging for food. The other one, a redbone coon hound, doesn't wait for a hand-out; she grabs life by its horns and counter-surfs. Guess which one is my favorite? (Hint: the beagle has a pink collar)

If I figure out how to get to the AW beta readers thread, I'll leave you anonymous bad comments. Kidding! Good for you!

colbymarshall said...

Cute pup!

Ray Veen said...

Hey Pink - I actually linked to the thread, for your convenience: click 'Fiersom's Brood'. But don't feel like you have to do it anytime soon. Thanks for stopping by.

Colby - Thank-you. Buddy is one of two labs, actually, that quietly follow us around hoping for random dispensations of food.

VeeFlower said...

That dog is a good actor...I just know those kids are feeding him green beans and whatnot off their plates without you knowing...no animal at your house would ever starve! What he really is saying is, "Please, a little beef or bacon, all these veggies are giving me gas!"
OH, and I do plan on reading your "Brood" with the idea of critiquing it. You asked!

Serena Woods said...

Your dog needs a hug. I want to scratch his ears.

I hope I helped you on your chapter. I want you to know that I was serious, I really liked it and want to read more.

PS: Were you in foster care or did you just write it out of the blue? It was really good. check pm's

s

Ray Veen said...

Veeflower - I'm excited about having you read it, but I made the mistake of bringing most of my beta copies to the hospital. People snapped them up like free pizza and a couple of them are taking a long time to read it. I think what I'll do is give you
Cindy's copy - she's almost done - but you'll have to share with that incredibly short person who hides out in your back bedroom.

Serena - Buddy's the kind of dog that if you scratch his ears, he'll press his unstoppable bulk into you until you either fall over, or your fingers snap off in his fur. He's one of those 'forceful-petting-recievers'.

I'm glad you liked my story so much. I could easily email it if you're serious about wanting to read it.

And no, I was never in foster, but I take it you were - it's a big relief to hear that my MC's attitude towards it was believable.

Elizabeth said...

I LOVE chocolate labs. They are my favorite kind of lab! That photo is very cute and he is handsome indeed.
Ok, so shop talk, I'll wander over. Can't say for sure if it will be today, I have much work to do on my WIP (see today's post), but if not today then tomorrow.
I'm sure it's great and you have nothing to worry about.But that's not what you want to hear now is it? You want the ugly details.
And so you shall get them.

shortensweet said...

Buddy is a love. Every chocolate I've met is a forceful pet. My Boz being one of them. He was like 80 pounds and thought he was a lap dog so it could be a lot worse!!

I can't wait to read the book! Hurry up and finish it Cindy and Mom!!!

Ronald L. Smith said...

Good stuff BPV, I left a comment for you at AW Forum

Vikki said...

Oh, my gosh, I would instantly relinquish any and all yummy food/treats for that little baby face!!!! He's so dang adorable!!! I'm normally a cat person, but he had me at hello (or woof, i guess)

I, too, will venture over to read your stuff...though little guy had decided that he feels sick again any time mommy tries to pull her computer out. May take me a few days ;>)

Ray Veen said...

argh happy argh national argh talk argh like argh a argh pirate argh day.

argh I'm not very good at it yet, but I'm practicing. Argh. Should be fun.

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Elizabeth and Vivi - you like the dog, huh? Maybe I'll post more pictures of him like, lying on the floor, lying on the couch, lying on the deck, lying in the grass.

Looking forward to your crits, and please, feel free to find all the fault you can with it. I'm mature enough to not confuse honesty with abuse.

Shorty - I think I'm gonna order you a special copy of the book. One with a short binding and short pages full of short letters. As the first person to ever purchase my writing (and subsequently ask me for my first autograph), I think you deserve that much.

Prince Balthazar - Your comments on AW were very encouraging and comforting, and I'm putting you on my Christmas card list the moment I hit the 'publish your comment' button.

VeeFlower said...

I am about a quarter of the way through Fiersom's Brood, and here are some comments:

The story carries you along effortlessly. None of those long descriptive paragraphs some self-indulgent authors are so in love with....this is a very important feature for me, because in order to hold my interest, a story has to have a steady flow. Fiersom's Brood keeps moving, which makes you want to keep reading!

Also, I was somewhat daunted at first to find out how many characters there would be. Call me senile, but I don't like having to work at getting to know and remember a great many names and personalities, especially when they occur so soon in the story. Well, it just wan't a problem. I found it very easy to remember each and every character introduced, a very pleasant relief for me.

I have other comments, but I will save them. I think it's a cracking good story, I really love the characters so far, I find them very believable and yet not stereotyped...way to go, V, can't wait to find out more about what is going on with this brood!

Jewel Allen said...

Thanks for giving me the link, Ray. I will give it a look over tonight. And thanks too for the blogrolling tip...I love it.